Friday, February 2, 2007

Plot Cliches Part Deux - Heroes too stupid to live…

I’m all about equal rights or in this case equal stupidity. Today let us visit heroes who should be removed from the gene pool, preferably by drowning.

Things I’d do if I were a hero too stupid to live…
  1. Order the heroine around instead of talking to her as if she possesses a brain capable of cognitive functioning.
  2. Assume any male she has a conversation with, or hugs, is her lover, when it is more likely he is her brother (or father).
  3. Kidnap the heroine to have her all to myself for no apparent reason (other than as a plot device).
  4. View the heroine as a whore because she is sexually active, but praise past lovers as vibrant sensual women.
  5. Refuse to tell the heroine I think she’s hot, even though I get a hard on every time she’s in the same room with me.
  6. Keep some deep dark secret from the heroine because a.) I want to protect her. b.) I don’t think she’d understand.

That’s just a few to get you started. Feel free to list your pet peeves for heroes in the comment section. Tomorrow, the evil bitch other woman’s “To Do” list…

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