Killing a beloved character

I have to kill somebody and I couldn't do it. I'm not an assassin by nature. I love the character I had to kill off and she's my hero's mentor. But I had to kill her anyway and I had the worst time with it. I wrote all last week but she wouldn't die! Finally between yesterday and today I managed to do away with the old girl.

I created a death musical playlist. No really. I needed to get into the right mental framework to do the deed. So I found some great songs like: I Believe by Diamond Rio, Tears in Heaven by Eric Clapton, and Into the West by Annie Lennox - among others. Individually those songs can choke me up - but as a group! Sheesh I was crying long before I started writing.

I'm not sure the scene is as wrenching as I wanted it to be, but I got it written. I'll just have tug at the heartstrings a bit harder when I go back and work on editing. Now if I can just handle the funeral and get her buried, I'll be in great shape!

Have you had any characters who wouldn't die? If so, how did you kill them off? Was it as painful for you as for your characters?

What are they thinking?

Yup, I'm a long time fan of CSI: Miami. I like all the CSI franchises, but I admit I was partial to Miami and especially Horatio Caine. Now, I was not a major David Caruso fan in the NYPD Blue days - or since. I don't know if he was too cocky or his hair was too red. But age has made him hot. Kind of like what happened to David Bowie - but that's another column.

But as a writer I need to write a little rant...spoilers will be involved so close your eyes unless you don't care or have already seen the episodes...

So anyway, I was happily watching the story arcs waiting for H and Yelena to get together when Ray returns and whisks her away. Okay... I can cope. It is all bittersweet and H is adrift again. But then the 4th season happened and so did Marisol Delko. First of all - this woman looks young enough to be his daughter.

Now I KNOW there are men that date women 20-30 years younger but they are usually guys like Hugh Hefner or actors like Michael Douglas - not regular guys like cops. It kind of creeped me out. Remember this is supposed to be Horatio Caine and not David Caruso (50 year old new dad - more power to him) we are discussing. Let us not confuse the two men.

Okay - so he dates a 28 year old woman and he's in the neighborhood of 50. I try to swallow it - but then there is no passion between them. Hell there was more passion between H and Yelena (whom he maybe dated) than there ever was between H and Marisol (whom he married)! No physical affection for Marisol and I'm not talking about him carrying her off to the bedroom but how bout a single kiss...even on the cheek? Nothing. She touches him - he doesn't touch her. And when she is conveniently killed the day of their wedding (and what's up with THAT!!) who kisses her on her death bed? Her husband? Uh...no. Her brother. Her husband wants to run and get the bad guys. Understandable to want to get the guys that killed your wife, but the only emotion he shows is a few tears which do NOT escape - because he's a manly man.

Can we tell I'm fed up with the writers? The topper was last night. H is the kind of guy who HAS gone out on a limb for his people. Hell, he all but covered up a drug test for Eric, but let Ryan be human and have a gambling debt and he's fired? Excuse me? Does H face him down and fire Ryan himself? No. He lets...get this...STETTLER do it. Arrrrgh.

Where is the Horatio I used to love? I wish the writers would get a grip and quit tweaking or whatever they are doing before I turn it off permanently. And it will cost them money if I cease to watch - I've bought all the past seasons on DVD.

Oh Horatio, we hardly knew ye....where did you go?

rant over...for now...stay tuned!

I went flying!

I’m so excited I just had to share with everyone. I went flying on Saturday, November 25, 2006. Mark it on your calendar! No, I don’t mean I got high - like the Harry Chapin song.
I got in a small aircraft (a piper) and went 2500 feet into the air accompanied by a trained pilot. It was the COOLEST thing! I got to taxi around the runway, handle the yoke and rudder during take off, and fly the plane while we were airborne! I love flying! When I scrape the cash together, I’m planning to take lessons.

I can hear you out there - okay we’re happy for you, Cesca, you went flying. What the heck does this have to do with writing? Ah, my friends, much. I can now have a character take flying lessons, or pilot an aircraft. When I write a scene about flying, my writing will have the authenticity of having done it.

Doing some activity or skill you plan to have your characters do helps you get in touch with them more deeply. By flying, I can share the excitement of the first flight with readers through my character. The moment when you leave the ground in a small craft is so totally different then in the commercial craft. You can feel it more and it’s so much more immediate. After all, it’s just you and the plane-and the instructor. I let him land. Hey, my mama didn’t raise no dummies.

My flight instructor said he’s been flying for several years now and it never gets old. He still loves it. That’s knowledge I can use. Also, I now know someone who might be willing to let me pick his brain about an aviation business if I want my characters to be part of one. The knowledge I gained by flying isn’t just what I’ve read or seen on TV. I’ve experienced it and damn its cool!

I’ll keep you posted about my flights. You’ll definitely hear when I get to solo for the first time.

Hot damn, what a ride!